beautifully broken

on friday, in my 365 class, our prof showed us a music video...

kanye west - george bush don't like black people

who would have thought our prof would show it. LOL.

2007 has great shows. i'm going to be so poor. and i have to pick and choose which ones to go to!

January 12 @ Kool Haus
- Fall Out Boy with New Found Glory, the Early November, and Permanent Me

January 30 @ Mod Club
- Augustana

February 4
- Incubus
- this show is sold out :(

February 18 @ Kool Haus
- Jack's Mannequin with Head Automatica, The Audition and We Are The Fury

Feburary 28 @ The Guvernment
- Switchfoot with Copeland

march 14 @ the Phoenix Concert Theatre
- cartel with cobra starship, boys like girls, and new atlantic

march 14 @ The Opera House
- relient k, mae, sherwood

march 29 @ Arrow Hall
- taking back sunday with underoath and armor for sleep

march 30 @ Arrow Hall
- taste of chaos

april 21 @ phoenix
- bullet for my valentine

may 4 @ phoenix
- paramore

may 11 @ acc
- my chemical romance

may 17 @ kool haus
- brand new

may 26 @ molson amp
- FOB, TAI, +44, Paul Wall, Cobra Starship

back at school and classes have started.

i want to go home for my birthday. but i won't be going home.
i want to buy junk food because i have none.
i feel like sleeping forever.
i feel like skipping these next few months and having christmas holiday '06.

that i want to go to.. but possibly won't get a chance..

September 23 - UnderOath with Silverstein, Moneen and He is Legend @ Kool Haus

October 3 - James Blunt @ ACC

October 11 - New Found Glory with Early November, Cartel, and Limbeck @ The Phoenix

October 28 - Hellogoodbye with Reggie & THe Full Effect, Cute Is What We Aim For, and David Melillo @ The Opera House

the long weekend was awesome! lack of sleep during the weekend but it was well worth it :)

friday after work, went to dinner with christine and cindy. dropped my car off at home and cat came to pick me up and we went to pick up emm and mandy and off to matt's. it was great seeing everyone again and meeting new people! :) got home at 4 because we had to take care of friend. haha. i'm so glad that he's okay!

saturday, woke up and then went to the mall to get mandy's present. after that we went to matt's house to help him clean up from the night before. went back to cat's house and walked over to steve's place.. played pool while waiting to go to dinner. went to pick up emm and then to dinner with the others. dinner was great and at night, some guy came in to play and sing. he was amazing at the piano and his voice was incredible. all of us (minus the guys, who wanted to steal his talent) wanted to take him home! :) haha. after dinner, just chilled for a bit and mandy wanted to go out so we stayed out until 3 just chilling.

sunday, went to the opera house for paramore concert. hangouts with grace and angie.. and met a few of her friends.. the concert was amazing live. i was soooo excited when they played a cover of my hero. and so excited when they played their entire album. these concerts are making me deaf, but they're well worth it. i love it!

monday, kinda just bummed at home and chilled with the rents in the morning. and later at night, cat called me out so we went out and chilled.. which happened to be at metro because the guys wanted to play jitz (why do they go out and pay to play jitz when they can do it for free?).. =/ haha but whatever, it was still cool to see the guys and i also saw adrian. which was good because i haven't seen adrian for awhile. after metro, we went to timmy's to chill and stayed there for a good 1 1/2 hrs just talking ... talking about the past. LOL.

so screwed for tomorrow. sigh. the worse is that it's MC and i suck at MC stuff. i love exams that are short-answer because even if i don't know it, i make it sound like i know it and then get at least part marks. haha. but i guess with MC i just have to guess.

so today we were suppose to have a softball game but it started pouring like mad. and then when it started to die down, went outside with trace and val and just kinda danced in the rain. haha. it felt so good. sometimes i really hate the rain, but other times i really love the rain. maybe because i just had a crappy week it felt good to be outside. there's something so calm and peaceful about standing in the rain. it's like in that moment, all the crappiness went away and i was actually happy again (i haven't been happy for a long time. and only one person will understand that).. although i was insanely wet after and possibly might get sick now, i would do it again.. even though some people might think i'm crazy.

it never stops. i'm already trying my best at everything and i'm not asking for your help. i'm already as independent as i can be right now.. what more do you expect from me? one minute you're telling me this and the next, you're telling me that. why do you have to contradict yourself? sigh. i wish that sometimes you would just understand when i tell you things. and i hate how everyone has to talk behind my back and think so little of me. i'm not deaf and i still do understand when you don't speak english. i hate how mom tells me that everyone has thought about me this way for the longest time. it sucks when everyone looks down on you. it hurts a lot. and you ask me sometimes why i care more about my friends than my family. well you have your answer. it's moments like these that i can't wait to graduate and move out and possibly move far away as possible. there's only so much that one person can take before they lose it.

i don't even know why i wrote this. this is way too personal for the public...